the life and times of

vintage sesame street

2009-02-11T02:04:00.003-05:00

So this is how the astrobiology seeds were sown in my developing brain 20 or so years ago. i find it highly unlikely that an advanced visiting species would not know what a telephone was, or read from a book directly; i'll forgive the scriptwriters for sacrificing some accuracy and intergalactic political correctness for clarity (of new and different cultures):

a red fox

2009-01-19T17:52:00.002-05:00

acrylic on canvas. 11" x 14".

secret santa gift

2008-12-11T15:08:00.004-05:00

(it's a flask)

via sister's computer, san antonio, tx

2008-11-26T13:09:00.004-05:00

There is a skill set necessary for successful navigation of the diversve hills, major circles, and traffic of san antonio. And yes, it can be forgotten.

summertime concert

2008-11-20T12:20:00.004-05:00

recording

2008-11-10T15:19:00.004-05:00

I'm going to start carrying around a small pad of paper and a pen. The pen will be for graffiti, but also for writing down quotable exchanges as they happen. I am toying with the idea of buying an audio recorder, too. Here's one I hazily remember from friday:

On train, MGH to Harvard:

Unstable man to woman: "Is that your boyfriend?"
Girl with boyfriend: "Yes"
Unstable man to woman: "How long does a human being live?"
Girl with boyfriend: "I don't know"
Unstable man to woman: "Just give me a number ok, whatever, just say a number."
Girl with boyfriend: "75"
Unstable man to woman: "How you expect a man to be with ONE girl for 75 years!"
Me: "HE SPEAKS THE TRUTH"

computer program of MGH elevators

2008-11-03T13:52:00.003-05:00

1. If service button is ON, open doors, wait for 2. unless 3.
2. If floor button is ON, go to indicated destination
3. < 3/4 elevators are idle on floor

collaboration #1, with D. Y. & R. B.

2008-10-28T18:03:00.003-04:00

acrylic, spray paint, sharpie marker, paper, on canvas. 12" x 36".

origin of life bliss

2008-10-22T19:04:00.025-04:00

I guess I was asking for it. It was only a matter of time before the wacko creationists would contact me, as I am in graduate school in an origin of life lab:

Esteemed Academics (Evolutionary Biologists and Theistic Evolutionists),

I am pleased to announce the existence of "The Origin-of-Life Prize" ® to be awarded for proposing a highly plausible mechanism for the spontaneous rise of genetic instructions in nature sufficient to give rise to life. To win, the explanation must be consistent with empirical biochemical, kinetic, and thermodynamic concepts as further delineated herein, and be published in a well-respected, peer-reviewed science journal(s). www.us.net/life/

It is well known that the scientific community is greatly undercompensated for its heroic efforts to uphold objective unbiased truth in our society. This prize presents an opportunity to remunerate the virtuous efforts of scientists to promote awareness of the truth of Darwinist theories.

Also, to demonstrate the sincerity of my promise to the Detective Thomas W. Grimes of the UNCG police department not to harass you about Creationist ideas, I am submitting this information to you in the sincere hope that one or more of you will be able to vindicate your commitment to Darwinist idealogy and be concommitantly generously rewarded for your efforts to enhance the respectibility of this field of inquiry in the eyes of both the American scientific establishment and the taxpaying public at large.

May the most highly evolved man (or woman) win...

Sincerely,

Michael Korn

PS Here is some theological encouragement from Prof. Francisco Ayala, whose book, Darwin's Gift: to Science and Religion, suggests that the famous curse upon Adam and Eve in Genesis 3 is simply a metaphor to explain man's tragic awareness of his own mortality that results from his highly evolved brain attaining advanced lingusitic and other cognitive skills.

I have to say this email leaves me a little flattered. I haven't even published in the origin of life field yet, and this guy thinks I'm going to solve the whole thing! But I digress...

My swelled ego was dissolved (pun intended) by key words/phrases that demand attention: "Darwinist", "theistic evolutionist", "Darwinist idealogy [sic]", "highly evolved", "curse". All indications of a certified wacko. How could I not click his website (while my heathen experiments played themselves out on my lab bench).

A brief review of his Web 1.0 website demonstrates a painful non-understanding of biology and biological terminology.

But I thought I might read the "Judging" section. How could I resist such divinely-inspired word choice. First, submitted proposals describing how life began from abiotic processes undergo "non-academic in-house staff" review. Sounds ROUGH. If it passes the test, they will ~~burn your data, hunt you down and kill you~~ forward your proposal to one of 200 listed scientists listed on the website (my boss comes in at number 3). Any legitimacy this list of distinguished names adds to the website is destroyed by the color scheme (see Figure 1). Everyday is Easter at the Discovery Institute!

Figure 1: The retarded moose that birthed Sarah Palin learned HTML.

A quick glance through the "Suggested Reading" section lists Behe's Darwin's Black Box. Good lord.

But something jabbed at me as I considered replying to the email with youtube links of cats flushing toilets (sometimes I feel like that's kind of been played out). Why would he feel the need to CC a police detective in this email? Has Mr. Korn encountered prior trouble with the law? Further research diminished my amusement.

The answer is maybe. Michael Korn is suspected to be behind death threats sent to Univ. of Colorado biologists. However, I cannot confirm that this is the same guy. But also I kind of can't bring myself to care.

untitled

2008-10-20T15:25:00.002-04:00

I always hate waking up with ideas for new, interesting experiments.

Mass-produced art prints hanging in TJ Maxx, I've heard, are the purest expression of art. Because, you know, no critics are around.

2008-10-01T12:33:00.002-04:00

I decided to wrap an unused canvas with untitled #1. I think this looks better on my wall.

the first bull fight

2008-09-30T19:36:00.005-04:00

acrylic, spray paint, soft medium, highlighter, on canvas. 18 x 36.

waltzing man and woman

2008-09-30T13:00:00.003-04:00

acrylic, spray paint, paper, marker, on canvas. 18 x 36.

whaaaaaa....??!

2008-09-24T16:22:00.002-04:00

i forgot about this

2008-09-23T13:58:00.002-04:00

graffiti

2008-09-22T20:23:00.004-04:00

This sign was on my baymate's bench at lab. I had to get banksy on its azz. I think my attempts at graffiti art just took a more controversial turn.

seventh-grader matt almost gets it right

2008-09-01T18:49:00.003-04:00

7th graders voice their perceptions of what scientists are like before and after visiting Fermi labs.

preview

2008-08-04T15:43:00.001-04:00

A preview of what is the current frontrunner for my halloween costume '08.

4-2-4-3

2008-07-28T12:19:00.001-04:00

Acrylic, spray paint on canvas. 30 x 30.

decay

2008-07-28T12:18:00.002-04:00

Acrylic, spray paint, marker on canvas. 12 x 24.

Noah Kalina photography

2008-07-24T11:05:00.003-04:00

The lab I work in was photographed by Noah Kalina for an art project "Labs at Night" featured in Seed magazine.

Part of the project investigates what happens at night 'when the researchers have gone home'. In reality, many of us were probably at our benches when he was snapping pics.

The 14th and 15th pictures are the inside and outside, respectively, of a shared cold room. I go in there to cool off on hot days.

the environment

2008-07-23T21:50:00.002-04:00

Today I went through 6 pairs of latex gloves and ~240 milliliters of polyacrylamide because of inadequate large-gel pouring skills. Sorry polar bear cubs. :(

bird and hunt

2008-07-17T15:40:00.004-04:00

Acrylic, marker, paper, and tape on glass.

detail

mj research

2008-07-11T16:16:00.004-04:00

the polymerase chain reaction, by Michael Jordan Research

islands

2008-07-02T16:59:00.007-04:00

I traveled to Spectacle Island and George's Island with some friends, departing from Boston Harbor. Apparently Spectacle Island, or Testicle Island, for short, is mostly man made, and built upon a foundation of dead horse carcasses and trash. Consequently, there was an incredible amount methane built up within the island that caused ongoing fires back in the day. Because of this, I think they should build a monument of a fossilized horse continually on fire. There are a lot of birds and things to look at, and the island offers some really good views of Boston (but no trash cans).

I forget what this town is called.

Ahh... lab stress just melts away at this point.

Rich people ruining the environment, and waving at us. They're nice.

The sand on the beach was mostly rocks and broken glass/plastic.

Close-up: grain of sand. Seriously.

This is a fort on George's Island. There are all kinds of interesting tidbits about the Civil War posted, like how awkward it was for Union soliders to hang out/ play football with captured Confederate soldiers.

Typical Boston real estate.

And here's a bonus. The Garden a few hours before the Celtics won it all. Not that I am a Celtics fan.

connections to the past

2008-06-30T16:34:00.004-04:00

Several years ago somebody in the lab bought 5mg of guanine. It remained unopened (receiv'd 6/02) when the lab was located across the street, and was ultimately stored in a communal cold room in the lab's current location. In a dessicated plastic container, with evolutionarily related compounds stored with it, it waited. Next to it, experiments from nearby labs were planned and executed. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, months into years. The focus of the lab shifted from aptamer-ligand interactions (its original purpose) as more students and scientists began to work on the proto-cell.

And then I came along and needed it. This is a monday mind trip (e.g. how does anything come together to work on a monday, when you most need it? Especially when you need to order something, because if it goes out on a monday its guaranteed to be backordered a month or so.).

How history plays itself out, and how we hand off ideas and chemicals to the next generation, and how ultimately this boils down to the universe producing us to explain it, i think it's interesting.

update*: spoke too soon, the compound didn't go into solution and is unusable. It IS monday.

daily datum

2008-06-12T19:01:00.006-04:00

Autoradiograph of an electrophoresed denaturing gel containing a P32-radiolabeled aptamer (nucleic acid that binds a target). The defined band indicates the aptamer, while the broader signal is due to unreacted P32-radiolabeled ATP. This little guy has taken me more than a year to discover.

boston 1/2 moon (from my room)

2008-06-11T12:20:00.005-04:00

One can view only a tiny slice of the sky from one window in my apartment. So, I was pleasantly surprised that I could see the moon last night.

exploring life's origins

2008-06-08T15:33:00.002-04:00

I thought I would use a post to draw attention to a new website a post-doc in our lab made about the origins of life on Earth. This is a really good resource for the kinds of questions I get to spend my days on.

untitled #'s 3 & 4

2008-06-08T14:24:00.005-04:00

I used the so-called online "rasterbator" program to convert a small image of a Twin Peaks actor into a larger-scale pdf. I originally had all corners tacked, but I liked how the Boston humidity had curled up the paper, so I decided to release the bottom half. If the pages are stamped flat against the wall its really not as visually interesting. Overall I was pleased with the outcome, but I would like to eventually have each panel framed, that might have an interesting effect.

This wasn't really planned at all. The neighbors who provided WiFi for me to steal recently moved (or got a password), so I haven't had internet at home. This, matched with the absence of television and the desire to read pushed me to paint. This is roughly a model of my apartment building, and I am actually really happy with the final piece. There are also cutouts of characters from the Loteria game found in the piece.

forensic science

2008-05-23T15:31:00.005-04:00

married to the sea.com

yelp

2008-05-20T15:00:00.010-04:00

Yelp removed my original review of Mulligan's, the restaurant with a racist owner who sells t-shirts of Senator Obama portrayed as a curious george:

"Racism is not cute or funny.
Do not provide this 'person' with business.
Since controversy of this gravity is what this owner needs to sell business, what he sells can't possibly be good on its own merit."

Yelp's response:

"Hi Simon,

I'm writing to let you know about our decision to remove your review of Mulligans. Your review was flagged by the Yelp community, and our Customer Service team has determined that it falls outside our review guidelines: http://www.yelp.com/faq#great_review - specifically: Irrelevance. Reviews aren't the place for rants about your political ideologies or a business' advertisements.

It's not that we support racism or bigotry, however, we still need to enforce our review guidelines. As you can see, reviews such as create situations where listings are bombarded by reviews that have even less to do with this business than politics. While you may not agree with the political and socio-political beliefs of this business, the review section of this site is not the forum in which to pursue this agenda.

We review every situation with detail and care and take the removal of reviews very seriously.

Regards,
Roger
Yelp User Support
San Francisco, California"

It is striking that Yelp doesn't think it's users will change their habits based on the racist beliefs of the business owners. Also amazing is the fact that my review says nothing about the political stance of the owner but is solely about the racist t-shirts the owner of Mulligan's sells. In my opinion, everyone should be informed about whether or not the person making their sandwich is a racist.

My email reply:

"Pretty odd my review expresses no political ideologies, and that I assume other people (especially people of color such as myself) would care to know if their sandwich was being prepared by a racist.

Please review this with serious, detailed care: go fuck yourself, you racist pecker-head.

Regards,
Simon Trevino"

And here is my new review within their guidelines:

"If you find a pro-racist environment hostile, as I do, don't spend your money on the goods here.
Hostile environment, crappy, clueless owner. Their food and atmosphere is so bad they have to grab business by being openly racist."

I guess we'll have to see if that one lasts.

no hitter!

2008-05-20T13:52:00.003-04:00

ping pong wars

2008-05-19T19:31:00.011-04:00

Recently, we were asked to take down our mini-ping pong table set up from lab. The reasons for tearing it down were mostly confusing, still obviously arbitrary:
1. there must be things on the table (no empty lab space whatsoever)
2. the ping pong net is a fire hazard

So, to remedy this, it logically follows that we should get rid of a small net (which takes up lab space) with other lab items (likely to be as much, if not more of a fire hazard).

My personal response, posted on the wall next to the table:

does science make belief in god obsolete?

2008-05-19T00:05:00.002-04:00

Some of today's biggest thinkers in science provide their response on this issue. The PDF of all responses is available for free download on the Templeton website.

chemistry outreach

2008-05-17T18:22:00.002-04:00

making internet wavez

2008-05-14T21:50:00.006-04:00

Today I was perusing reddit, and came across a blog detailing how some racist in georgia sells racist t-shirts at his bar and is getting some kind of cnn-level recognition about this.

The blog posts the information of the racist owner's establishment, so I decided to hunt the business down on the yelp review website. Well, I laid down the first negative review of the place, and replied to the blog with the yelp listing. It has now been ~6 hours, and 16 other reviews have popped up, some serious, some hilarious.

I have officially started my own internet wave. Kewl.

mgh can has award?

2008-05-13T16:20:00.004-04:00

from The Scientist: Massachusetts General Hospital is the best place to work in academia for 2007.

"This year, Massachusetts General Hospital took the top spot. The institution's employees gave Mass General, with a federal budget for life science research of $327.2 million, the highest marks for factors such as job satisfaction, peers, management and policies, as well as infrastructure and environment, and research resources."

I would say that we have a good chance for '08, if it weren't for the broken printers.

packard instant imager and canon printers ruined my life

2008-05-12T18:22:00.032-04:00

Today I ran a transcription reaction. The transcription reaction is loaded on a denaturing gel, which separates the products of the reaction from the substrate (starting material). I use a radioactive substrate so that we can visualize where it appears on the gel by a machine that detects radioactive counts. The machine then prints out an image that is the size of the gel, so that I can place the actual gel on the print out, and cut out the product with a blade. In this way, I can recover the products from my reaction.

So, this machine runs on windows 95. The reaction worked perfectly, so I attempt to print my data. The printer destination is responding, but the actual printer is broken. No big deal, I will reroute the print job to an available, working printer. Luckily, a nearby printer is already installed into this computer, I.P. address and all. I try. Nothing. Apparently the computer can't find the working printer.

This confirmed earlier suspicions that it was in fact, Monday.

Ok, this will be difficult then. I turn on the first, broken printer, in hope that some quantum effect may make it work. It doesn't. No need to panic, I will go to the neighboring lab (~50 paces), and recover the I.P. of one of their printers on the network. I do this, switch the I.P. of an existing printer setup on the windows 95 machine, and nothing connects. It's time to establish a new printer from scratch. The computer can send jobs to the broken-down printer, so it should be able to find other printers on the network. But it doesn't. It can get on the internet, send print jobs to the one broken down printer across the building, but it can't detect any other printers in the building. Kewl.

I repeat the above attempts two times over, for a lack of an appropriate melt-down plan. I then decide it would be clever to email the image to MY computer, which has repeatedly proven itself willing and able in the task of printing (it's a Mac). Surely, adobe photoshop can handle ".img" files... ".img", that sounds normal/common. Nope. Adobe and all my other imaging programs do not recognize ".img".

Well, I reason that neighboring labs are likely to have a similar machine with the software running on it, so that I can open my file and print from there. Dock 15 minutes off the clock for running around the floor, looking for similar-looking machines and computers, and interrupting other people's work to find out, ultimately, there is no other machine like this on our floor.

Here's where the desperation sets in. Surely, I can install the software on another PC, open my document from email, and print from that computer to another printer. Now where could those CDs be... I find them, in the pre-reincarnated form of three separate, 3.5" floppy installation disks.

A new hope? 3.5 floppys from before mp3s existed.

I scramble to find a PC in the lab with a working floppy drive. I begin installation. It works! But first I have to "reboot" the computer. Who uses that term anymore? 1989 uses that term, that's who. Anyway, upon double-clicking the program, I get an error: "Packard Instant Imager can only run in 256 color mode". Ok. Ok. We'll switch it. Not so fast, Optimistic Opie, PCs made after 1990 don't exactly come bundled with the 256 color mode option.

Time for last ditch approaches (It's now been ~an hour). I consult my old friend, the Internets. 3rd Google hit after keywords "Packard Instant Imager has ruined my life" yields a curious email inquiry page, kind of like a blog, kind of like a FAQ message board. Apparently, someone else's life was ruined in 2005, and s/he decided to make a plug-in for a freeware java image viewer, Image J.

At this point, I wonder, what are the chances? The chances that this program would work must be infinitely smaller than the chances that I am setting myself up for maximum disappointment and frustration. To my surprise, Image J is not PC-only, and installs correctly, and the ".img" image appears on my personal computer. I am so close to the ultimate disappointment, aren't I? When I attempt to print at 100% (actual) size, I get an image that is about 50%.

Ok, that's easy enough to fix, I'll just compare this to an old picture printed directly from the machine on the right printer. The only problem is, I don't keep that data. Therefore, I fish for old printouts in the biohazard waste. Success (!) (?), I find an old print-out, adjust the size by comparing the real print size to the one my computer prints with a RULER. No, that's not an acronym for a computer program, it's an actual ruler. The kind pilgrims used. This gives me a factor for which to increase the actual size. Somehow, this doesn't work. So I make estimated guesses on 5 more prints. The kind of estimated guesses pre-historic humans made.

I finally succeeded in printing the right size (plus or minus 2 pixels), and everything worked. A step that normally takes 30 seconds took ~ 1 hour. Therefore, Monday slows research down 120-fold.

traffic advisory emails for the <1% of students that drive to school

2008-05-08T10:59:00.002-04:00

09:24:45 AM Public Affairs: Update 2 on May 8 annoying email traffic advisory

03:58:52 PM Public Affairs: Update on May 7 annoying email traffic advisory for Longwood...

03:43:39 PM Public Affairs: Annoying email traffic advisory for May 7

my desk

2008-05-01T23:40:00.009-04:00

It might be interesting in several years to come back to this and remember what my desk looked like now. Probably not. But here's to killing 7 minutes.

Where the in-vitro selection thought magic happens:

1 art by my niece
2 picture of Enceladus
3 art by my niece
4 kitty/puppy calendar
5 losing at scrabulous
6 lab notebook (only numbers, never units (or dates))
7 hplc trace of the product of a mutant enzyme
8 chemical structure of retinol, my college crush
9 chemical structure of GTP, my current crush
10 Ernst Haeckel anatomy drawings
11 card with pretty picture of space on it
12 new "data"

And my view of bos-merville:

untitled #2

2008-04-24T23:17:00.002-04:00

This is inspired by the West.

spring, and untitled #1

2008-04-24T20:34:00.002-04:00

It's spring outside my window:

I finished a print yesterday. I started with 3 sequences I pulled from an in vitro selection I completed late last year. After producing secondary structures by running them through mFOLD (Zuker), I just layered them over each other in photoshop and removed some artifacts caused by increasing the print area (jpeg of file). The print was only $9 at FedEx, and is ~44 x 36 inches. I spray painted the bush of life, based on this image.

2008-04-22T19:28:00.000-04:00

I'll start this off with some really cool anatomy drawings by Ernst Haeckel.
I might print these out and hang them up some time.

I realize I am behind the popularity wave of M.I.A., but I just discovered her website, and am basically amazed.